Am I talking back to myself?

You know you are a mom who stays home alot and doesn't have much interaction with other adults when you talk to yourself (outloud) ALOT. I do this. Maybe I have always done it. I dont think of it as crazy at all. I just think that when you are a mom there is rarely a peaceful moment where thought can go on in only your head with out getting terribly distracted and subsequent thought jumbled. SO, I have to talk outloud to myself as a way of reminding myself that I am having an idea or thought and that I should not forget it or let it get lost in the chaos.

This has worked well for me the past couple of years. But this morning, something different happened. Someone answered back to my random gabbing about how I need to go pick up that recycling cart. Had I finally gone crazy and started actually hearing myself answer back without trying? OR was I actually starting to have a two way conversation with myself? Had I gone that far into the introverted abyss of mommydom?

No, Lucie answered me back. Maybe it is time to minimize the absent minded chatter. Who knows what she has been listening to? The rambling mind of a highly distracted working mother who is trying to get by day to day maintaining both a business and a very active and messy household. I would have never thought that mothers have such filthy mouths and soap opera-esque diatribes going on in their minds, and in my case, very aloud.

Whats up with That!

I actually told Jarred this last week at the BR Landscapers Association party, "Why is it that no matter how old I get, I always get sat at the 'bad kids' table?" This was very funny to us both. I was sitting with the GMs from the local commercial nursery and irrigation supply store. Apparently, nursery and irrigation gm's are like yin and yang. One wild and crazy, the other quite and calm (Earth and Water if you will.) Anyway, the wild ones, including my husband were making quite a stir. It only made me feel better that these were the "in" crowd of the group, haha. Anyway, it seems that no matter how much older and laden with the 'boring' responsibilities of motherhood and business, I am still with the wild crowd when I go out. Even when going out to a work function.

Working Girls!

We worked hard around here today. Not much to say except that I felt like a pin ball in a really good pizzeria this morning. I am tired, very tired. Like I took the sheets off the bed to wash them, and I almost decided to just sleep on the mattress tired. I figured it was easier to put new ones on than explain to Jarred (ie. listen to him complain about it). I hope it quits raining here. It is really putting a damper (pardon the pun) on my work situation. I made not so good stirfry and a pretty good pie tonight. If I would have realized how quickly I would crash out, I would not have cooked at all. I had already promised MacKenzie stirfry so....she got not so good stirfry. Off to the bed, with sheets, I might add.

It's a Wonderful Life?

The theme song to our life around here has laughingly been "If we make it through December, everythings gonna be all right, I know." HAHA! This has been a crazy rollercoaster ride of ups and downs. Honestly, I would have written more often but I usually try to only write uplifting things, and this month has been sort of minute to minute. I have had some major accomplishments though. Our tree is up and the house is decorated. Lucie has been having alot of fun with her Elf on a Shelf and the Nativity Advent Calendar that I got her. On a more personal note (re: Lucie) she is just about potty trained, only having a couple of accidents this whole month. Unfortunately they are usually poop accidents, but I will take it. Lila is sweet and wonderful. It feels amazingly normal to have my own two girls to take care of. Lucie is very nice to her sister and loves on her all day long. Only once has she decided she didn't like her and honestly I couldnt blame her. Lila had been screaming in the back seat for quite awhile.

Lucie has been learning lots of Christmas songs. She especially likes "We wish you a Merry Christmas". MacKenzie tried to teach her 'Feliz Navidad'. No one could really understand it. But it was still funny.

All I wanted for Christmas was snow for Lucie. AND WE GOT IT!! Only a once in every 75 year occurence. I am taking it as a personal/professional sign that 'Anything is possible'. I needed that sort of emotional boost as I have started having pseudo-anxiety attacks everytime I see a "Going out of business' sign up here in town. Without going into it too much, we are plucking away. While the contract from CCL was a blessing, it is also putting a world of hurt on my cashflow until the contract is paid. I am going to have to do some major negotiating with the bank this week to bring it all together until next month. I can do it though b/c 'If we make through December, everything's gonna be alright I know.....".

Jarred and I had alot of fun at the BR Landscaping Assoc. Christmas party. I was amazed at how many people I actually knew there. We sat with some really fun/nice people and I really enjoyed myfirst night out since Lila's birth.

I am having so much fun getting ready for Christmas and have a ton of ideas that I am working on. I hope that somehow we make it up to Indiana, but it looks like the end of next month will work out better. This is bad for Jarred b/c if I remember correctly Jan is colder than Dec. hahaha.